Whatever time we have.

It’s true that the life of an international worker, missionary, or other world-changer is one of constant movement, of new assignments, of adventure, of ends and beginnings, and a unique experience of nearly consistent grief.  I thought I would have a break from that lifestyle for a while when I ‘settled’ in Boston, but here I find myself just eight months after arriving with only a few days left filled with goodbye meals and last coffees and final experiences meant to sear these moments into long term memory before stepping onboard the plane that will fly me away from here for at least the foreseeable future if not forever. 

It used to be really difficult, saying goodbye, even devastating; but in the last few years and especially now I find it much less so. It’s certainly not because I haven’t invested deeply here; on the contrary, I’ve loved the community, the friends, and the special relationships I’ve forged in this season; relationships that have made me a better person, and will forever be woven into the fabric of my soul and life and story. I am and will always be forever grateful.

But I’ve also found what comes with the transient, nomadic life is an appreciation for the here-and-now, a conscious decision to grasp every moment of joy I possibly can wherever I find myself, without considering whether it might last an hour or a few weeks or forever.  The result of living a life that is one where the only constant is change is that I intentionally pursue the richness and fullness of joy in meaningful relationship in whatever time we have.  Sometimes those relationships last across the miles and years, and sometimes they don’t, and both are fine; both are valuable, meaningful, worthy investments in any heart and soul and the life well lived.

It might sound cold or callused, but I don’t ever want to really miss people or places or long to be anywhere other than wherever I happen to be in that moment. Now I’m not saying I don’t miss my family or friends; of course, when I see photos pop up on Facebook of the latest niece/nephew antics or of a friends’ adventure that I would have enjoyed sharing with them, there’s always a twinge of longing, of wishing somehow I could simultaneously experience that with them while still fully engaged wherever I happen to be. But I do try to keep my general state of mind always fully present in the season and space I find myself; if I spend too much time longing to be elsewhere, it’s probably a pretty good indication I’m not meant to be where I am or it's time for a change.  And if I were to miss everyone I’ve known, loved, and released I wouldn’t ever be able to get out of bed.  A contentedness even in difficulty, when everything in me knows I’m in the right place no matter what the circumstances, is an act of obedience and trust and faith and something I wouldn’t trade for anything.

So as I navigate through another time of ends and beginnings I find my words failing me as I try to express my gratitude.  To the dear ones in Boston: I’m a better person now that I was when I arrived, and that’s because of you.  Thank you for joining me in this season, for being a part of my story.  You’ll always carry a special place in my heart and life and I will be thrilled if/when our paths cross again in the future. To the dear ones I’ll see in the coming weeks as I hop to Colorado and then onward to Seattle, I’m excited our paths will cross once again, thanks for sticking with me across miles and years.  And for the yet-unknown and unmet treasures I’ll meet in this new season and adventure, I pray a richness of life and fullness of joy over whatever time we have.

A beautiful spring-like day in Boston